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For Everything We're Not

by Throwaway Sunshine

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1.
Winter came as no big surprise but still swept me off my feet. Whoa to the family that meant nothing to me. I swear I won't be found. Take all those last things I said and burn them with me. With no direction all around-why should I believe your any different than the rest of them? All alone with a bottle of whiskey trying to put myselft to sleep. Whoa to theses streets that mean everything to me; I swear I know this town. But I won't die(unless I really have to choose....)
2.
Hell To Pay 04:12
I've swallowed words in red and choked on what they said. They became a bar-room fight that broke out in my head. I drank communion wine, I've broke communion bread....a vampire with spilt blood, a cannibal with torn flesh. It's been too long. Same old song I've been singing. Will I learn or will I burn?....myself again. First you give then take away. A tug-o-war of wills.....a game we always played. Hell to pay for heaven's sake. You've got hell to pay my friend. Hearts on trial but given grace. It's what you will. It's all what you will.
3.
Dreamland 03:06
To the poor working class struggling on the front lines; this is all we have. If we had anything to give we'd make them learn a lesson; we should stand together. Vacant eyes will search for time if we had the cash to spare; we could be just as free as the rest of them. We learn to breath in everything. They reach for their wallets hoping it will save them. A couple years will go by on this empty stomach but I will always be grateful. They're owning up to nothing. I hope that we can see this. They're owning up to nothing in this dreamland, in this dream....
4.
Ears To Hear 03:45
From young we were taught that it's better for some things to love what they've lost....a tight grip on nothing. We've been scarred, we've been bled, and gutted from the start. At this game of life and loss, we've all played our part. Hearts hung on dirty sleeves and notes, that sing a song of new hope. All ears open and all arms are closed. Still waiting for a new hope. All ears are open and all arms are closed. I'm waiting for the day to open up it's arms for me. I'm waiting for the day, I'm waiting.
5.
Wake all the vipers up, time to say hello again. Save the day by turning off the phone. She's all alone again, carries the weight upon her shoulders. All the things that he could never hack... Now it's 3:30 on a thursday afternoon and I crawl my way back to the liquor store. My love, I'm hanging myself upside down My love, I'm sorry I'm fucking up again..... Another small, sad conviction was whispered to me again. If I'm gonna do this right, it's gonna take some time. You're gonna have to stand right next to me... Cuz' I fell down so hard but I'm gonna get back up again....
6.
I've stood and took these punches. Black and blue from your voice. You said that it meant nothing. That you didn't have a choice. You've blown your whiskey kisses. Now it's all hit or misses. I'm just too tired to care anymore. I'm just too tired. She said at least I can't feel anymore. Take me home. I'm sorry.
7.
Crack open another can of salvation. Congratulations unemployment. I'm well aware of the light that's placed before me, but I refuse to turn it on. And I've lost 3 teeth since I last saw you but I still know how to ask why. Just lay the fucker off right before the holidays. Let him fight for every meal. And don't forget about that past you left behind and fall asleep on the floor. I've lost ten pounds since we last spoke & I'm still waiting to die. Hallelujah, "praise the lord" they saved another soul... Oh god where are you? I'm sick & tired & weak. Oh god where are you? I'm tired of dragging my feet.... I've lost ten pounds since we last spoke & I'm still waiting to die....
8.
We drew our lines in quicksand but never crossed them anyways. We always ended up standing. Together we had something the world couldn't replace. We let it all slip away. Family, friend or foe? (I really wish I knew just where I stood with you). I can't tell the difference anymore (just really wish I knew just what to think of you). Our dead past and unborn future is all we have to share. No more you, no more me.....an undone pair. We built walls between that we broke down anyways because we always had forgiveness Now we build walls between us and we break down. In our worst conditions, we can watch them all fall down In our worst condition.... In our worst condition we can watch this all fall down.... In our worst condition...
9.
I'm always open to my accidents. Sometimes I wish they never happened. As we get older and these days get quick to end, I wish I could take back... My body aching & my mind's insane. I wish I had something brilliant to say but I'll carry on with the intentions of giving in, not trying harder.... I'll pray to god, with the intentions of giving in. Open my eyes, show me something I haven't seen quite yet....
10.
The sun is coming down but it's still out of reach. I'll do anything to stomach something other than lies tonight. I never thought a $1.50 could save me. Check my pulse, am I breathing? Just another day of waiting to be "saved". The sun is coming up; another day of waste and defeat. An empty wallet with bills to pay. A broken heart, a halo of shame. I never thought a couple of pills could save me.... Cold rain falls hard. I'm dying to be heard. I'm dying.

credits

released November 6, 2009

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Throwaway Sunshine Denver, Colorado

We played hard, drank hard, and fought hard....now we are no more.
Throwaway Sunshine was:Eric Epling- Bass
Camden Trendler-Drums
Kevin Wickes-Guitar/Vocals
Cory Trendler-Guitar/Vocals
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